Un-announced guests, sibling and children bickering, photo ops, hosting parties, school functions, ancient traditions, overbooked calendar, overspending, overeating…everyone’s exhausted. Are you putting on a “happy face” trying to please others and in reality pleasing no one, even yourself? Have you thought about escaping to a deserted island and returning after New Years?
It seems as though the entire year’s events have culminated for one giant pressurized finale, demanding our fullest attention and energy before we close out 2014. It’s no wonder the expectations of Christmas are stressing you out. Here are some tips to help you relax and enjoy the season.
Have a family meeting with your children to determine and write down what activities are the most important to each member of the family. Then prioritize the activities and add them to your calendar. You could print a list of activities for each family member, having them number the list in order of importance. If they do this individually, you’ll have a better idea of how they really feel. Maybe this could become one of your new family traditions, “the family holiday conference with hot cocoa and cookies”. This will also help eliminate the “we have to go where? why?” questions later.
Discuss eliminating obligations that aren’t on the list of your most important activities. A vote to make sure everyone is on board may be a good idea. Later, you will need to respectfully discuss your decisions with the parties it involves well in advance, so there are appropriate expectations. Sometimes as parents, we continue to meet our parent’s unspoken expectations of traditions they began when we were our children’s age. Your parents may be waiting for you to suggest a change. Chances are, they will understand your reasoning and respect your decision to serve your immediate family’s needs. After all, they were once in your shoes feeling the same pressure you feel.
Other ideas can be found in this article from the WebMD web site. Each family has their own set of circumstances and struggles. Each family has their own belief system and values. With good communication and respect of other’s differences we can have a holiday season that will allow us to show the true giving spirit and peace of Christmas.
